One thing I hate more than anything is when athletes thank god after winning a sporting event. My question is why would god give a fuck who won the super bowl or the US Open? Really how can any athlete be so self centered to believe an all powerful being would take the time out of their busy schedule to help out one person win a game?
Seriously why would God care? Did God bet on the sporting event? Who would take a bet against God? This all doesnt add up, and when things dont add up you normally end up with a bunch of grade A bullshit.
First off I dont believe God would pick sides in a mortal game and I really doubt god would look so unfavorably on one team. This makes even less sense when you realize that both teams most likely had a pre game prayer. This means both teams should be on a level playing field with the big man. But always when a team is victorious they thank God for the victory, pure bullshit. What about when bad people win? The Baltimore Ravens won the Super Bowl with a man who should have been in jail for aggravated assault! Do you think God really pushed for his victory? Isn't it just wrong for god to work for the team with a felon on it?
What about when you lose? You never once hear people say it was Gods fault they lost. God never seems to be against a team, but he always seems to be for the winner. This doesnt make sense, it is Gods fault one team wins but not that the other loses. Hell if I lost in the championship and the other team was all over the news thanking god you better believe I am going to blame god for the loss.
In the much more the likely event of me winning the championship I would tell interviewers that even God was against me and I still won. Its good because not only have you beaten the other team without the help of God but you also get to claim that you beat God. And we all know how much we have always wanted to show up god before.
So next time you hear someone thanking God for helping them out with some bullshit problem like winning the super bowl tell them that god has no time for their bullshit games and is probably out creating hurricanes, volcanos, or some other fun natural disaster.
Saturday, August 30, 2008
Thursday, August 28, 2008
Swimming Doesn't Matter
Michael Phelps is an Olympic champion. Who really gives a fuck though? The answer should be no one, yet it seems that millions of people are currently all over his nuts for winning a few swim races. I have even seen places that have said he is one of the top 10 athletes of all time! Being a good athlete means you were able to compete against the best and come out on top.
Swimming in general is one of the shittiest sports in the Olympics. Just think of the competition a swimmer faces. It’s not like running where anyone can do it any time and know how they did. Swimming takes a special place to swim in order to know how well you have actually done. A 50 meter pool is the standard for swimming competitions. You can’t just race around your backyard pool and have real dreams of being an Olympic swimmer.
Let us compare swimming to running. In running each individual race is run based on a distance and sometimes hurdles. The high degree of competition in each event causes people to specialize in one or in very rare occasions two events. When an athlete is good enough to win multiple events it’s a spectacular achievement. Also world records can stand for several years and when they are broken are barely broken by the slimmest of margins. Phelps on the other hand like most swimmers is able to swim several different events. And not only compete in each but beat the world records by seconds each time. If swimming mattered and actually had a good pool of competition this would never happen. People would have to specialize in one or two events and world records would be more consistent because the records would actually be set by the worlds best and not by some lucky bastard who into the right place at the right time.
I am so glad the Olympics are over now so I don’t have to hear that bastards name for another 4 years. Lets all thank god that swimming is so meaningless in this country that we only hear about it during the Olympics!
Swimming in general is one of the shittiest sports in the Olympics. Just think of the competition a swimmer faces. It’s not like running where anyone can do it any time and know how they did. Swimming takes a special place to swim in order to know how well you have actually done. A 50 meter pool is the standard for swimming competitions. You can’t just race around your backyard pool and have real dreams of being an Olympic swimmer.
Let us compare swimming to running. In running each individual race is run based on a distance and sometimes hurdles. The high degree of competition in each event causes people to specialize in one or in very rare occasions two events. When an athlete is good enough to win multiple events it’s a spectacular achievement. Also world records can stand for several years and when they are broken are barely broken by the slimmest of margins. Phelps on the other hand like most swimmers is able to swim several different events. And not only compete in each but beat the world records by seconds each time. If swimming mattered and actually had a good pool of competition this would never happen. People would have to specialize in one or two events and world records would be more consistent because the records would actually be set by the worlds best and not by some lucky bastard who into the right place at the right time.
I am so glad the Olympics are over now so I don’t have to hear that bastards name for another 4 years. Lets all thank god that swimming is so meaningless in this country that we only hear about it during the Olympics!
Labels:
Michael Phelps,
olympics,
sport,
summer,
swimming
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